How to Deal with Friends or Family Who Don’t Get Your Sobriety

Staying Sober with Friends
Image by kate mccarthy via Flickr

Getting sober is a huge accomplishment, and perhaps is the biggest accomplishment of a former addict’s life. While friends and family might be proud of you, they might not fully comprehend all that it took to get to where you are in your life now, or how fragile your sobriety can be. Here are some positive and constructive ways to deal with friends and family who don’t get your sobriety:

Stay Focused On Your Plan

Friends and family might not understand strict rules you have set for yourself or milestones you want to accomplish. They might think that once you have sobriety, you’re good. No other work needed. This is why it is extremely important to stay on the sobriety plan you have set for yourself. Unless they have gone through the process, they don’t understand all the work that goes into getting and staying sober. Remembering that when they offer suggestions or “advice” is what will keep you on the correct plan for yourself.

Get Friends and Support that Do Understand

Some people who get sober think they need to drop all of their friends and family from the times in which they were addicted once they are sober, but that is not necessarily the case. If they are bad influences and endanger your sobriety, then yes, by all means, reexamine your relationship. But if they are friends and family that love them, allow them to support you in your journey. In addition to that support system, find friends and support that have been through what you are going through, and support that can offer constructive ways to work through it. Your mom and dad may not be the best people to discuss the nitty-gritty of sobriety, so finding those people you can be open and honest with will help you in your sobriety greatly.

View Your Success Through Your Eyes, Not your Family and Friends

Turning down an offer to see the drink menu at a restaurant might be a big step for you in your sobriety, but your friends and family might not blink an eye. Be sure to not view your successes in sobriety through your family and friend’s eyes, because they might not see the importance or strength in moments like this. If you expect applause for these steps (while applause-worthy) from them and don’t get it, it might feel like a letdown.

Here at CASA Recovery, we help with addiction recovery and offer different levels of treatment to assist every type of addict. With levels of care ranging from detox, treatment, outpatient, and holistic, we will structure a program that works best for you. Come visit our staff in San Juan Capistrano, or contact us today!